Monthly Archives: July 2009

Fuck Murphy

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I don’t have much time or energy or inspiration to write but I want to take a few minutes to write about Murphy and his stupid-ass laws.

All summer its been one thing after another and really, it’s been two years of one thing after another so I’ve officially had enough of this. I would therefore like to tell Murphy and his stupid laws to go to hell.

Murphy, wherever you may be, “FUCK YOU! AND GET THE HELL OUT OF MY LIFE!”

There. I feel better now. Until next time, take care!

Friendship & adversity

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This is a much talked-about subject, but I want to address it again due to recent events. These last two months, I have needed friendship in a way that I didn’t think I would. I have seen people offer to help with things I would never have thought to ask for. I have had friends do some incredibly thoughtful and even sweet things (e.g. a friend brought me her favorite stuffed animal from her father during a hospital stay “to keep me company.” That was sweet and unexpected. Another friend dropped what she was doing to come and meet me at the ER, where she stayed until I was sufficiently knocked out 🙂 She later came to help me pack up my place in preparation for an anticipated move. Incredibly thoughtful and kind) Like I said, I saw some of my friends in a whole new light during a time of crisis and great stress.

However, that same adversity showed me a different face on other friends. The details are irrelevant at this point. What IS relevant is this: is it true that we see people’s “true colors” during times of adversity? I know that we hear these phrases all the time but I have always resented them. However, lately I have been forced to look these statements dead in the face. I am still left to question, however, if they are accurate. Is it possible for someone to love you and value your friendship yet still do something awful? Is it possible for someone to mean well but be painfully absent during a crisis? Is it really fair to judge a friendship based on the action or inaction of the other party during a time of crisis. Is it possible to be a good friend yet not that great at handling hard times?

A friend said to me this morning, “Prosperity makes friends, adversity tries them.” She got it from a fortune cookie 😀 but it did get me thinking. (I’ve seen this on her e-mail signature before but today, after a long, friendly lecture on what friends can and simply CANNOT do to other friends, especially in crisis. She was right, btw. Friends don’t do friends ‘like that.’ but I digress.) She did get me thinking about that though: is it really true that adversity basically weeds out the wheat from the chaff among your friends? What if someone means well but is just not a good ‘crisis handler?’

While I do not waste precious time contemplating details of wrongs done, I would like to spend it in search of answers to these questions; in search of the truth about friendship, and what it means for those of us who value it oh-so-much. Food for thought…let’s eat! 🙂

Silence: Friend or Foe

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I’m curious to know what you think of silence. I know I have not written in a while and have not kept to my once-per-week rule so in that sense, I have been silent. It’s also something that I have used in relationships, and other areas of my personal life. So, what do you think of silence as a tool?

First, I have been silent from the blog because basically I entered a phase in life, a difficult season that required me to stop all unnecessary movement (action) until these current storms of life had passed. In other words, I needed to go with the flow until these angry waters finally spat me out and I could breathe. I am writing today because I’ve finally been able to come up for air. I’m not sure how long that would last but at least it’s enough that I am able to come here and re-charge.

Moving on…I think silence can be used as a tool of destruction, distraction, contemplation, and survival just to name a few. Silence can deeply wound so it’s probably best not to use it as a tool for destruction. So, what you really think of silence and how you have used it in your own life? Let a sista know! Ciao, and see you sooner rather than later 🙂