Category Archives: God

Ode to Friendship

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Have you ever had someone do something so great for you, unexpectedly? It could have been a stranger (like the security guy who quite randomly and unexpectedly gave me a free pass to the viewing deck at the Rockefeller Center in NYC), or an acquaintance or even a friend. They may have given you good advice, time, a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, a monetary gift, maybe they even connected you to the right people for your career….the list is endless. The point is, if you’re like me, they gave you exactly what you needed at that time. Did you thank them? Do you remember them or were their actions forgotten shortly thereafter? Do you try to be like them to others?

Well, recently certain people showed up in a big way for me. This post is about them. This post is about saying “thank you” to unexpected friends at an unexpected time. This post is to inspire you to think of those that have shown up for you, to thank them in your own way, to remember them as often as possible, and to be one of them as often as you can. Here are a few of them who made a positive impact to my life these last couple of weeks.

C, my friend and hairdresser sure didn’t think he’d be earning his stripes as a therapist when he agreed to do my hair. Try to imagine what it must feel like to be washing a client’s hair while she cries, applying hair stuff while she cries and putting her under the drier while she cries! I imagine it must have been quite uncomfortable, and yet he hang in there with me. Eventually, I was able to share the cause of the tears. He in turn gave me very good solid advice that quite literally saved my sanity. It also strengthened our friendship and trust.

Maggy unexpectedly stopped by my house. Maggy told me that she hadn’t planned on coming over on that particular day but felt she needed to. I wasn’t expecting her either. That visit brought us much closer and she ended up giving me advice on both a professional and a personal matter. On that day, she brought me friendship and clarity on an issue that was threatening my peace of mind. Maggy also removed intimidation about certain things that were overwhelming me. Tell me God didn’t arrange that. Actually, don’t because I won’t believe you.

M is a man I’ve known practically my whole life. We met quite randomly on that day; I was going to the store to get some soda and french fries (my latest addiction:) ) and bumped into him. He is responsible for a recent (and lasting) burst of optimism and enthusiasm regarding a certain major decision in my life. He is also responsible for my latest life motto: ACTION NOW! I doubt it was his intention to inspire me forward on that particular day in that particular way – we were just hanging out after all – but God knew that I needed him and so he came. It’s quite a nice feeling to have a friend re-enter your life, but when they bring with them what he brings with him, it’s definitely an added bonus.

My mum! Yes, I was surprised by this one since we’ve had a challenging time these last twelve months or so. I didn’t realize how much a certain person/situation was stressing me out until I told her about it. Talking to her allowed me to vent and gave me access to tried and true advice, which stopped me from making a radical decision that may have turned out to be a mistake. I needed what she gave me, and God knew she’d be the best person to give it. In addition, it brought us closer than we’ve been these last twelve months.

MPrissy is a friend I’ve know for years. I won’t say much about her because I simply don’t have the space. Let me say it this way: she’s the friend to whome I recently wrote “Oh my God, I really  am FAT…so depressing…” and she wrote back “…inbox me…” because she knew that this wasn’t normal talk for me; these are not words that typically leave my mouth. Simply put, she gets me. When I need a friend who gets me, I get her (get it? hahaha). Seriously though, I’m the lucky one here.

This list should be much longer because so many people have added to my life. I also accept that this list is unfair because it only focuses on the last couple of weeks, and even then I know I’m leaving some people out. My word count doesn’t allow me to name them all here but, what I do hope it allows me to do is point out the many ways we can be a blessing to someone else. It’s quite humbling to be the recipient of so much goodness so in turn, we should strive to add goodness to someone else’s life. We should be the friends we wish we had, or in my case, we already have.

I hope this inspires you forward. Of course, I also hope you come back often and share your experiences in the comments section. Remember, 2011 is the year to say YES to life and as evidenced by today’s post, to say YES to friendship.

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What Easter?

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First of all, happy belated Easter. Good thing I wasn’t in charge of alerting the whole world that Jesus Christ had risen from the dead coz the news would be several days late! Thank God for small mercies, I guess 😛

I would love to tell you that I had a deep and meaningful Easter. The (unfortunate) truth is that I totally forgot about it. That’s right: I FORGOT that Christ had not only been crucified but also risen from death. I mean, if you’re not a Christian I can see why this may not be a big deal but if you’re a Christian you know that this is baaaaad, right? I, Mia, forgot the whole basis of my chosen faith. What in the world was that about???? To make matters worse, I went to church Sunday and within minutes I was ready to leave. In addition, we kept singing these “Jesus is risen” type of songs and that STILL didn’t clue me in. 3/4 way through the service it finally dawned on me: “Ooooooohhhhh, thaaaat’s right; Jesus rose from the dead TODAY!” What’s up with that?????

I’m hoping that you had a better and more meaningful Easter. At the very least, I hope you remembered the reason for the season. Please do tell me how you spent yours. You already know my embarrassing tale of forgetfulness so feel free to share 🙂

Legacy of a man (with love)

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I am so sad to be writing this but I wanted to write something in honor of this man. When I was a little girl, I would always “tell on” my mother to him. He would hold court and lo and behold, the verdict would be in my favor. What’s not to love? 🙂 There’s more to love about this man; so much more than I can write in one simple post. That doesn’t mean I can’t try…

1. He showed me love. I can’t think of a time when I did any wrong in his eyes. In his eyes I was perfect and worthy of love, just the way I was. He often call me “kanuku,” “gathufu” and “kanyama” in jest. I would call him the same; I was too young to know better 🙂

2. He was hardworking. He wasn’t just hardworking, he held himself to the highest standards. That is one his legacies to me; that hard work pays and even when it doesn’t, it mustn’t be exchanged for lazyness.

3. He cried. My family recently decided that I must’ve have “taken” after him because…well, let’s just say that I’m not  shy about expressing myself. To put it mildly, without me Kleenex would go out of business :). The reason this aspect of his personality means so much to me is because I knew him as a man with not just sympathy but empathy as well.

4. He was generous. He would give you the shirt off his back plus his shoes. I used to think that he was that way with just me because I was his “wife” but I have come to learn that this was his nature. Generosity wasn’t just a big word; to him, it was a verb applied to many

5. He loved me. I know I wasn’t the only one he loved but knowing that he loved me means so much. I knew that I was always welcome in his home and in his heart.

You may be wondering who this great man was. He was my grandfather: the man who gave me his name to carry as my own. He who survived colonialism, spoke well and eloquently and deeply deeply spiritual, kind, fun and so much more…and now he’s dead.

It’s true that he was blessed with a long long life. He saw the birth of several grandchildren and great-grandchildren and buried a few, including his own children. None of that means anything to me because I miss him so much and I want him back. He was my grandfather and he was precious to me.

It feels like the end of an era, (that’s what I was going to title this post) but I now see it as the legacy of a man. By his life, he left a great legacy to be learned and upheld. I will miss him so much and hope to live my life in a way that brings honor and positive recognition to the name that he gave me. I love him, in death as in life, and will miss him dearly.

Thank you Lord for the gift of this grandfather and thank you grandfather for leaving us your legacy. I hope to do you proud.

A Paradox…a most ingenious paradox…hahaha….

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That’s a line from one of my favorite operettas, The Pirates of Penzance. What a great show! Anyway, I seem to have entered an interesting phase in my life: the randomness phase, complete with irony and a paradoxical existence.

I’m going to spare you all the details and save those for my shrink 🙂 However, I did have a moment of realization today that even though things are not working out the way that I’d like, there’s still so much good happening – and what a pleasant surprise! The thing is, I’m quite the type-A person and I want things a certain way. To be fair to myself, I DO work my tail off so that I can have the outcome that I want. Since you don’t know me, allow me to tell you how well that plan has been working: it hasn’t. Not by a long shot, but let’s let the shrink deal with that 🙂 🙂

All of that being said, I am learning to remember as often as I can that just because I have a plan doesn’t mean that it is the BEST possible plan. As a Christian, I am reminded often to trust God and let me tell you; it’s no easy task. However, there is something to be said for that because according to my favorite verse (Jer. 29:11), he evidently has a plan in place for my life, and yours and everyone else’s. I hope that’s true because I’ve done all I can do.

Let me end by sharing with you something that has held me together through the toughest times: He sees what is in front of us and ahead of us. We only see what is in front of us. Obviously I hope that if you’re reading this things are going great in your life. Fantastic even! If not however, take heart and dare to allow the paradox and ironies in your life. You might find that your friends have fled when you needed them BUT then a friend you wouldn’t even think of asking for support steps up to the plate and gives you what you need, and then some! Just go with it and trust, and don’t forget to be thankful. Even if you’re not a Christian, trust in the knowledge that all will be well.

I hope to hear from you on this and if you’d like to, definitely feel free to share your thoughts or comment or whatever you’d like. God bless and hang tight!

Carrie Prejean on Larry King Live

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I saw a clip of the interview on the Larry King Live show by Larry King himself. It was with that so-called beauty queen. What’s her name? *sigh* lemme google her; gimme a sec….yes, Carrie Prejean. First of all, that tweet thinks that Sarah Palin is brilliant. Haha, that was where she lost me but it also helped me understand her better. However, what really galled me was her attitude on the show. She needed the show for her book, he needed information from her for the show (yes, the show that was going to allow her to sell her product). Larry asked, she answered, he moved on to a question from a caller, but dumbo over there didn’t even know that because she’d taken orders from someone off-stage to remove her mic. This was all childish but whatever; she’s an idiot so I wasn’t totally surprised. What really bugged me was this attitude she seemed to have right from the beginning, like she was going to teach Larry a lesson or that she was going to show him or put him in his place.

Let me tell you something, you empty-headed embarrassment: you made a total ass of yourself and your behavior on that show was uncalled for and stupid. Furthermore, Larry King has earned a reputation in his field and beyond that you could never touch so a little respect and decency on your part was necessary. Remember, you chose to go on his show for a reason and he was gracious to allow you the privilege. I say “allow” because there are plenty of people with goods to peddle who don’t make it to that show.

You’re a terrible representative and an embarrassment to the pageant, your faith, your character, your integrity, your intelligence…you’re even an embarrassment to the person or people who were charged with the duty to instill some morals, values and class not to mention self respect and respect for others. Your behavior on Larry King Live and your attitude toward Larry King was classless and shameful.

Shame on you, little miss beauty queen. Your looks may get you a sex tape but they will never earn you respect or get you class. Shame shame shame on you!

PS: Before anyone says it, let me be clear: this woman’s stand on gay marriage has nothing to do with this post. Her behavior on this show 100% does!

 

It’s not over-yet!

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I’m not gonna lie; even though I’m back from a summer of crises, I’m still facing some leftover stuff. That’s a nice way of saying “I still have some shitty and weepy days.” I’m not even kidding; I have days (or hopefully, moments in days) when I feel like things will never really get better. As if things couldn’t be worse, I find that as a christian my faith isn’t always the rock I’d hoped it’d be and even worse? Sometimes christians haven’t exactly been supportive, as though somehow this was all my fault…maybe if I was just a more perfect christian, went to church more, blah blah fucking blah 😦

Anyway, I was having some such moments and lucky for me I had a friend. My girl LT (you know who you are :)) happens to be loving, supportive, understanding, compassionate and so much more AND she’s a christian who understands where I am and why I’m there. There was lots of talking and tissues involved. In the midst of it all, she said “it’s not over yet.” Such a simple statement and yet she might as well have YELLED it coz that’s exactly how I heard it. Don’t get me wrong: a lot of what was said was helpful to me but this simple sentence was a lifesaver tonight.

I share this to say that if you’re out there feeling like shit, try to remember that it’s not over yet. As cliche as it sounds, there is a light at the end of the tunnel and no, it’s not a train 🙂

To my friend LT, thank you for being the kind of friend I’ve needed these last few months, weeks, days and tonight. I love you and I’m thankful to you. Big hugs and kisses your way.

I’m back

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Ok, I know I’ve been gone a while but trust me; it was for the good of all involved. Now things are better and I’m ready to get back on the horse, so to speak.

So, tons has happened but I don’t really wanna get into the nitty gritty coz I’m trying to keep my posts short, or at least manageable. In a nutshell, here it is:

1. I celebrated a big ol’ birthday

2. I partied for 5-6 days straight for said birthday. This was so much fun!

3. I met someone. Yes, you read that right: I met someone during the partying. Mm hm…I’m definitely smiling 😉

4. I’ve made some pretty big decisions that will affect my life and the lives of some of my friends for better or worse

5. In general, I’m happier and calmer and even more trusting, with thanks to some very loving, patient, supportive friends. Thanks ya’ll, and watch this space for more personalized shout-outs to you.

OK…so I’m looking forward to seeing more of you again and again. TTFN 🙂